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[The Bucket List] Travel Light and Prepare for the Journey Ahead
Life's train will eventually arrive at the station of death, where all the wealth, health, and relationships accumulated over a lifetime will be left behind.
Pack your essentials, reflect on your life, and bid a proper farewell.
Pack your essentials, reflect on your life, and bid a proper farewell.
Or perhaps, book your next journey—to the Pure Land for further learning.
In the face of life's impermanence, you can still live with true freedom!
Original Chinese text by Chiang Yin-chih (江胤芝)
The Japanese box office hit documentary Ending Note: Death of a Japanese Salaryman (エンディングノート) tells the story of director Mami Sunada's father, who, in his final days, wrote down a list of tasks in his end-of-life journal: "Visit a priest," "Play wholeheartedly with my granddaughter," "Plan my farewell ceremony," "Go on a family trip with my mother," and "Tell my wife 'I love you' for the first time." With his family by his side, he fulfilled each one, ultimately passing away with no regrets. Throughout this journey, phrases like "I'm grateful," "I'm sorry," "I love you," and "I feel blessed" became his most frequently used words.
Death is a compulsory lesson for everyone. Preparing in advance for life's impermanence not only spares loved ones from distress and helplessness but also becomes a spiritual journey of self-reflection.
As defined by the Association of Life Planning in Japan, shūkatsu (終活, end-of-life planning) is "the process of contemplating one's final years, allowing one to reflect on the present self and live more fully, with authenticity and purpose." Yet, how to prepare for it remains an unfamiliar topic for many.
1. Organizing life: Creating a bucket list
Japanese end-of-life consultant Kazue Shibata (柴田和枝), in SOP for End-of-Life Planning! The Essential Life-Organizing Method for Everyone (50歳からはじめる人生整理術 終活のススメ), introduces various components in an end-of-life journal, including:
• About Me
• Contact Information for Family and Friends
• Property and Valuable Assets Information
• Thoughts on Inheritance
• Preferences for End-of-Life Care and Treatments
• Expectations for Caregiving
• Preferred Funeral Arrangements
Shibata emphasizes that the most important purpose of writing an end-of-life journal is for one to courageously confront these matters. While the journal itself has no legal effect, it helps express one's wishes. For legally binding asset distribution, a lawyer should be consulted to draft a will.
With the development of the digital age, "digital legacy" has also become an essential aspect of end-of-life planning as part of one's personal belongings. This includes online banking, investment accounts, website login credentials, and digital files stored on computers or smartphones. It is advisable to organize ID and password information in advance and entrust a reliable person to handle them after one's passing. Additionally, one can digitize cherished photos for loved ones to remember them or prepare preferred end-of-life audio to listen to, such as Buddhist chants, Dharma talks, Gospel hymns, or recordings of music and poems.
For funeral arrangements, Buddhist practitioners may opt for a solemn yet simple Buddhist memorial service, incorporating sutra chanting, prostrations, and Dharma teachings to invoke the compassionate guidance of Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. In terms of burial preferences, eco-friendly natural burials—such as tree burials, flower burials, sea burials, or scattering ashes in nature—have become increasingly popular. In Tibetan Buddhism, there is the traditional sky burial (or bird burial) which allows the body to return to nature.
2. Reflecting on Life: Learning the Four Paths of Living
As we approach the final chapter of life, memories of past experiences, joys, and sorrows unfold before us. The wealth, health, and relationships we once cherished will eventually be left behind. How can we learn to accept it and let go?
In palliative care, trained caregivers use "life review" techniques to guide the terminally ill in reflecting on their life's ups and downs from a positive perspective. This process helps release emotions, resolve inner conflicts, and find peace. Professor Lai Wei-Shu (賴維淑) from Meiho University's Department of Nursing shared a three-level questioning technique through the Hospice Foundation, which serves as a meaningful tool for self-reflection:
1. Engaging with the Life Story of the Terminally Ill:
○ Can you share your life story?
○ What do you consider the most precious moments of your life?
2. Exploring Life's Cores Themes: Love, Forgiveness, and Reconciliation:
○ Is there someone you wish to forgive or seek forgiveness from?
○ Are there unspoken words of love in your heart?
○ If you could relieve your life, what would you do differently?
3. Fulfilling Unfinished Business for a Peaceful Closure:
○ Are there any remaining tasks you wish to complete?
○ What do you consider the most valuable lesson in life?
In recent years, "funeral parties" have gained popularity in countries like the UK and the US. These gatherings help break the taboo surrounding death, allowing the dying to bid farewell to loved ones, express gratitude or apologies, and mend relationships before passing. Reconciliation and rediscovering the value of life often help individuals let go more peacefully.
However, even with the love and presence of family, death remains a solitary journey, which inevitably comes with fear and uncertainty. To help the elderly confront the reality of death, Ven. Yan Guan (演觀法師), the Abbot of Nanshan Fangsheng Temple (南山放生寺), conducted an "Impermanence Experience" for senior learners. Participants were covered with a symbolic "death shroud," while listening to Dharma teachings. Families of the elderly were guided to participate in supportive chanting alongside other learners. Many learners were deeply moved, shedding tears. As a result, they cherished their time with loved ones even more and found themselves less fearful of death.
3. Building Faith and Upholding Right Mindfulness
All religions address the ultimate concerns of life and death. If the dying can establish faith and understand where life comes from and where it goes, they will experience less fear, loneliness, and helplessness. With faith, one may even embrace death with confidence, believing they will be reborn in heaven or in the Pure Land, in accordance with their belief system. From a Buddhist perspective, life is an infinite cycle until one attains liberation or Buddhahood. When this life ends, another begins. As Master Sheng Yen once said: "Buddhism gives confidence to the dying, teaching them that death is not suffering, but rather the start of a new journey."
Buddhism teaches that at the end of life, rather than being driven by karma or habitual tendencies, it is best to follow mindful intention or aspiration. However, if one has not diligently practiced virtue or made sincere vows, it can be difficult to rely on aspirational power alone. Therefore, cultivating the practice of mindful intention is the most accessible approach. Family members can encourage the dying to recall their past good deeds, inspire virtuous thoughts, or play Dharma teachings to help them maintain right mindfulness, ensuring a favorable rebirth guided by mindful intentions.
To help the dying uphold right mindfulness, end-of-life care and supportive chanting are exceptionally helpful. One of the most expedient ways is reciting the Buddha's name. Even if the body weakens and speaking becomes difficult, one can still silently recite Buddha's name in the mind. This practice helps diminish attachment, anger, and ignorance, thus bringing inner peace. By focusing on the Buddha's name, one can regain a sense of stability, and even develop confidence in the afterlife, possibly leading to rebirth in the Pure Land. Similarly, family members can participate in assisted chanting, offering comfort to the dying as they journey toward the Pure Land or a favorable rebirth while also cultivating their own inner peace.
When facing terminal illness and the process of dying, Chan teachings can also be applied to cultivate right mindfulness and self-compassion. Master Sheng Yen exemplified this approach, saying: "Do not fear death; Do not passively wait for death; Accept necessary treatments, continue daily activities, and live as normally as possible; Do not force yourself but also do not completely lose hope in life. This is the attitude of Chan." By embracing this Chan mindset, one can navigate the final stage of life with clarity, living a life of true freedom even in the face of impermanence.
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Resource: Issue 452 of Humanity Magazine (April 2021), Dharma Drum Publishing Corporation
Translation: Olivia
Editing: Keith Brown, Anne (麗萍)